10 Resume Lies to Avoid

10 Resume Lies to Avoid 10 Resume Lies to Avoid Your resume is often the first and only impression employers get of you prior to the initial einstellungsgesprch. It is, often more than any other, the deciding factor in whether or not you receive an interview for the lokalitt.This is one reason many find it tempting to embellish certain aspects of their experience, hoping to get a better chance at landing the interview.However, this can cause serious repercussions that may have a lasting effect on your career. Not just with that employer, but with others word can spread about applicants who arent being honest, and many people fired after being caught in resume lies have had their reputations ruined.In some cases, this embellishment is innocent. You may not remember exactly which month you started at a job you had a decade ago, or the exact amount by which you increased sales. If you are unsure about something, it doesnt belong on your resume.Here are 10 common resume lies to avoid.1. Listing inaccurate educational hintergrundCompeting with a well-educated workforce can be difficult, especially if you have no higher education. Its for this reason that some job seekers opt to add untrue statements to the education section of their resume.This can include anything from listing extra credits or semesters completed to universities the applicant didnt actually attend. Some even change their major on their resume to better fit the position to which they are applying.The reality is that checking up on someones education is remarkably easy now, and par for the course for most human resources departments. If someone is caught fibbing on their resume, the result can include termination and even being automatically denied a chance at another position.If you feel like you must exaggerate your level of education to be considered for a job, chances are that you are targeting the wrong job.2. Listing technical skills you dont haveHaving relevant technical skills makes you a des irable candidate for a job, but once you come to work the first day, its up to you to back up anything you boast in your resume.In many cases, the interview will test your level of knowledge in a specific technical field. A developer might be asked to write or fix a block of code, a writer may be given a small writing assignment, etc.Coming in to an interview based on having a certain set of skills, and not being able to perform them during the interview, can prevent you from landing or keeping the job.In many cases, technical know-how can be taught on the job, and employers are flexible with this as long as the applicant is honest about their level of experience going in to it.You can teach technical skills, but you cant teach honesty.3. Inaccurate employment datesIt can be difficult to remember exactly when you started or left a place of employment, especially years after the fact. That said, its better to be vague than inaccurate.Detailed employment dates are important to include on your resume, but if you cant recall the exact month you started job, you may be better off listing just the year.Alternatively, you may have the option to call your previous employer to confirm your precise employment dates. This is exactly what a responsible employer would do prior to hiring someone.4. Overblown salary historyIts best to leaveinformation about your previous salaries off your resume. However, some employers do ask for it. Like your employment dates, this information can be confirmed with a phone call, and inaccuracies here are taken as signs of dishonesty.This is especially true if you overstate the salary, as it would be seen as a trick to receive a higher offer.5. Name-droppingIf you claim to have worked with a famous name or big brand in a previous position, you should be ready to have that claim tested. You never know who your potential employer might know.Should your claim be tested and found inaccurate, you may lose your reputation with more than just the company youre applying to.6. Language skillsHaving a grasp of multiple languages looks great on a resume. For an employer, it equates to a useful tool in the event that someone is needed who speaks that language.However, this can blow up in your face if you boast fluency in another language you arent actually fluent in. You never know when or under what circumstances you might be called on to open dialogue with someone in their native language.7. ResponsibilitiesIts customary to list some of your key responsibilities at previous jobs in your resume (though of course its best to create a resume full of accomplishments). This can help the reader learn more about your experience and gain an understanding of whether you are capable of handling the role they are looking to fill.However, your responsibilities at previous places of employment can be confirmed. If you say you led a team when you didnt, or that you were in charge of social media management when you werent, those lines in you r resume can come back to haunt you.8. Job titlesApplying for a job as a sales manager, but the last position you had was as a sales associate? You may have filled in for the sales manager at your last job, but if you werent actually a sales manager, dont list it as your title.One of the main questions employers ask during the background check, or when talking to your job references, is the position you held at the company. Either they will state what you listed in your resume, or they will ask for the position. In either case, being caught in a lie here means no job for you.9. Volunteer activitiesVolunteer work is a great addition to a resume. It offers insight into your character, and can allow you to show off additional skills or fill in where employment gaps might leave your resume a little light.However, volunteer work is confirmable. Someone at the arbeitszimmer might volunteer for that organization themselves, and many (if not most) volunteer organizations keep records for th eir own legal reasons. Dont exaggerate your contributions to any organization or effort- paid or not.10. Certifications and other titlesFor a little money, you can become an ordained minister online From some of these same organizations, you can get a doctorate or be declared a saint.While you might be able to perform a wedding ceremony, most such titles do not carry any legal weight. Because of this, you actually run the risk of getting your future employer sued for liability if they present you as having a specific certification or title when, in fact, you dont have anything legitimate to back it up.Accrediting agencies keep detailed records of people who receive legally recognized titles from accredited sources. If your name isnt on these lists, then you will run into some problems during a background check.When it comes to resumes, honesty is the best policy. Its better to leave out details than to give false or embellished statements. Even if your lies land you a job, false sta tements can put your career at risk.Honesty is the best policy, scan your resume here

10 Ways to Reinvent Yourself After An Unexpected Job Loss

10 Ways to Reinvent Yourself After An Unexpected Job Loss10 Ways to Reinvent Yourself After An Unexpected Job LossYou did everything right, or so you thought You educated yourself, earned your degrees, landed some jobs that allowed you to gain some real-world experience. You made a lot of connections in the professional world. You did not think an unexpected job loss welches possible. Losing your job is something that happens to everyone else, except this time it happened to you.Dealing with job loss can be a humbling experience. In certain positions, you became a rock star. You were the go to person to solve issues whether it was internally at your company or for your external clients. Life was great, but just when you develop a system for yourself and a nice rhythm, bam Your position gets eliminatedThe client started downsizing their business and the program that you oversee has gone through major shrinkage.You saw it comingTo some degree, you saw it coming. But you hoped that thin gs would get better because of who you are and what youre capable of, but it happened. Despite your optimistic outlook, you take the severance package from your unexpected job loss. You move into action by sucking it up and putting yourself out there to market your skills. You start to look for new work.Sounds familiarWhether youve been laid off once or multiple times, this transition after losing your job can be the most challenging any professional can face in their lives. According to the types of companies you worked for, getting laid off may be a blessing, or a curse, for some.Unless you hedged yourself financially from the beginning of your employment, dealing with job loss will be difficult. The main school of thought typically isHow am I going to support my family?How long is it going to take to find a job?What is my marketability now, even though it wasnt my decision to leave the company?Why does it seem as though everyone else is moving ahead except me?Why did this happen to me and why now?There are so many more questions we ask ourselves after an unexpected job loss. We keep replaying them in our head until we cannot stand it. Losing your job can lead to hopelessness and eventually giving up. Others see it as a learning opportunity and persevere until they are back on their feet and thriving again.Ways to handle the transition after an unexpected job lossHere are some endearing ways to utilize the transition period that you are seeking employment in a very productive way, even when you dont feel like it. The following tips should distract you temporarily until you gain some perspective1. Road tripTake a mini road trip with your family for a few days to distract you for a bit. The worst that can happen is you have a little fun with those you love and you get to create some wonderful memories.2.Make a personal to do listFocus on all the things youve been meaning to do when you were employed but never had the chance to do. For example cleaning out the garage, potty training your kids (if applicable), work on improving your credit score, volunteering in and around your community.3. Start your own businessWhat are you really good at? Think about key problems you may have the solutions to for a niche market or general business. There are thousands of success stories surrounding people who lost their jobs and started their business as a result of having a new outlook on life.4. Start a blogWith all that accumulated education and work experience, Im sure you can think of some topics that you are an expert at. Someone is always in need of YOUR advice5. Brush up on your technical skillsIf youre not already a tech expert try to stay current. Get certified in something new like Salesforce, Quickbooks etc., that can add more value to your work history.6. Seek Inspiration DailyRead articles or books that will help you in your quest to become a better person and a stronger leader. Seek out books that will help you to become more innovative.7 . Attend free webinarsWebinars provide information on key topics like personal branding, emotional intelligence, salary negotiations and more. This allows you to become more open-minded.8. Diversify your networkWhether its on LinkedIn or any other social platform, connect with professionals outside of your industry to learn something new. You never know where this can lead. Knowledge is everything9. Help inspire othersSomeone actually is a lot worse off than you. The more you help others, karma has a really cool way of returning the favor at just the right time.10. Exercise, exercise, exerciseIf youre accustomed moving around especially in a large facility and all of a sudden you arehome, youll be tempted to eat more, eat the wrong things or become sluggish. Resist the temptation and stay healthyDealing with job loss is a learning opportunityRemember that every situation is a learning opportunity. Life happens. No one knows for sure why things happen throughout our lifespan to shake us up a bit. One thing is for certain is that life is too short to wallow in what did not happen. Moving forward should be the ultimate focus regardless of our circumstances.Its called hope.

This is how you can raise emotionally intelligent kids

This is how you can raise emotionally intelligent kidsThis is how you can raise emotionally intelligent kidsDealing with kids aint easy. They need an exhausting amount of attention and help.FromRaising An Emotionally anspruchsvoll ChildBehavioral psychologists have observed that preschoolers typically demand that their caretakers verstndigung im strafverfahren with some kind of need or desire at an average rate of three times a minute.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moraMost advice on parenting focuses on how to deal with misbehavior. While helpful, this is also akin to only offering advice on how to surviveaftera nuclear holocaust and elend talking about how to prevent one. Whats the secret to making sure yur living room doesnt resemble a scene from Mad Max Fury Road?What usually underlies schwimmbad behavior is how the child handles negative emotions. And this is something we rare ly teach deliberately and almost never teach well. Showing kids how to recognize and deal with feelings prevents misbehavior - and its a skill that will serve them their entire lives. It prevents tantrums at age 4 but its also the difference between saving college money and saving bail money later on. Look at it as potty training for feelings.But how do wedothat?ProfessorJohn Gottmanis the guy who revolutionized the study of relationships, getting it to the point where he could listen to a couple for just a few minutes and determine with a frightening amount of accuracy whether or not theyd divorce. Well, luckily, Gottman also analyzed parenting.And this wasnt the latest parenting theory-of-the-week that somebody came up with over lunch - this was a truly epic study of mind-bending proportions.He took over 100 married couples with kids ages 4 or 5 and gave themquestionnaires. Then conducted thousands of hours of interviews. He observed their behavior in his lab. Taped sessions of the kids playing with their best friends. Monitored heart rates, respiration, blood flow and sweating. Took urine samples - yeah,urine samples- from the kids to measure stress-related hormones. And then followed up with the children and families all the way through adolescence, conducting mora interviews, evaluating academic performance and Okay, enough. You get it. The plans of Hollywood Bond Villains arent this thorough. And when it came to dealing with emotions, Gottman realized there are 4 types of parents. And three aint so hotDismissing parents They disregard, ignore, or trivialize negative emotions.Disapproving parents. Theyre critical of negative feelings and punish kids for emotional expression.Laissez-Faire parents They accept their childrens emotions and empathize with them, but dont offer guidance or platzdeckchen limits on behavior.Children of these parents didnt do as well over time. They misbehaved more, had trouble making friends or had self-esteem schwierigkeits. One of them may be breaking into your car right now.And then there were the Ultra-Parents. These mothers and fathers unknowingly used what Gottman calls emotion-coaching. And this produced emotionally intelligent kids. These parents accepted their childrens feelings (but not all of the childrens behavior), guided the kids through emotional moments, and helped them problem-solve their way to a solution that didnt involve putting the neighbors kid in the emergency room.How did these tykes end up?FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildThe children were better at soothing themselves when they were upset. They could calm down their hearts faster. Because of the superior performance in that part of their physiology that is involved in calming themselves, they had fewer infectious illnesses. They were better at focusing attention. They related better to other people, even in the tough social situations they encountered in middle childhood like getting teased, where being overly emotio nal is a liability, not an asset. They were better at understanding people. They had better friendships with other children. They were also better at situations in school that required academic performance. In short, they had developed a kind of IQ that is about people and the world of feelings, or emotional intelligence.And it all came down to how the parents handled the childs negative emotional outbursts. These parents did five things that the other types rarely did.Alrighty, lets get to it 1) Be aware of emotionsParenting is stressful and can feel non-stop. Often its not like running a marathon - its like running until you die. So theres a natural tendency to look around when things are (finally) calm and think, Nothing is currently on fire. Okay, life is good.But this can be like standing in a coal mine ignoring the thousands of dead canaries. Usually emotions precede outbursts. So noticing the childs emotions early - and not just the resulting bad behavior - is critical.Not misbehaving doesnt mean not upset. When a passive-aggressive spouse crosses their arms, scowls and says, Im fine, at leastyou know theyre definitely not fine.Kids may not even understand what theyre feeling or how to best express it. So being aware and noticing early can prevent Tonka trucks from taking flight without FAA approval.But the problem many parents have here is noticing theirownemotions. If youre not aware of your feelings and moods youll have trouble noticing and relating to those of others.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildOur studies show that for parents to feel what their children are feeling, they must be aware of emotions, first in themselves and then in their kids Emotional awareness simply means that you recognize when you are feeling an emotion, you can identify your feelings, and you are sensitive to the presence of emotions in other people.Dont be afraid to show emotions in front of your kids. Gottman found that even anger (as long as its expressed respectfully and constructively) has its place. If parents hold back from showing feelings then kids can learn Mom and dad dont have these emotions and neither should I.Seeing arguments and then seeing them resolved amicably is far better than never seeing them at all.Kids need a role model not just for values, but also for feelings.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildSuch moms and dads may try to compensate for their fear of losing control by being super-parents, hiding their emotions from their children The irony is that by hiding their emotions, these parents may be raising youngsters who are even less capable of handling negative emotions than they would have been if their parents had learned to let their feelings show in a nonabusive way. Thats because the kids grow up emotionally distant from their parents. Also, the children have one less role model to teach them how to handle difficult emotions effectively.Shielding kids from emotional situations and then sending the m out into the world is like sending an athlete to the Olympics with no training. Kids need those moments in order to learn how to regulate their feelings.(To learn more about the science of a successful life, check out my bestselling bookhere.)Notice feelings now and avoid a crisis later. But what perspective did the smart parents take when outbursts did occur?2) Emotion is an opportunity for intimacy and teachingIts understandable to see a tantrum as an irrational inconvenience that should be eliminated ASAP. But the parents whose children thrived saw outbursts as teaching moments and a time to bond with their kid. Yeah, that doesnt always feel natural when a child is angrily throwing things.Does saying anything resembling, You should not feel this way ever work with emotional adults? Exactly. Then it sure as hell isnt going to work with your kid. SayingTheres nothing to be afraid of, or Oh, itll be fine is dismissive. This is how kids learn to doubt their own judgment and lose co nfidence.The Emotion-Coaching parents realized that a tantrum was the best time to connect with their child and teach them a valuable skill.Yes, you need to stop misbehavior immediately. But you want to do it in a way specific to the childs actions and not make it about their identity. So you want to say, We dont paint Grandmas couch purple, instead of, Stop being a nightmare The children who consistently heard the latter did not fare as well in Gottmans follow ups.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildWhen we checked in with these same families three years later, we found that the children who experienced such disrespectful, contemptuous behavior from their parents were the same kids who were having more trouble with schoolwork and getting along with friends. These were the kids who had higher levels of stress-related hormones in their bodies. Their teachers reported they were having more behavior problems, and their moms reported they had more illnesses.It takes practice but you want to see kids emotional pain like youd see their physical pain. Its not their fault. Its a challenge theyre facing. And one you can help them with.(To learn the two-exakt morning ritual that will make you happy all day, clickhere.)Okay, so youve got the right perspective. Youre an emotional mentor, not a corrections officer. But what do you actually do to help?3) Listen empathetically and validate feelingsDont argue the facts. Feelings arent logical. You wouldnt expect the new employee to know how to find the bathroom and you shouldnt expect a child to know how to handle emotions that, frankly, you still have problems dealing with after decades of experience.Dont immediately try to fix things. You need to establish youre a safe ally before you can solve anything.Understanding must precede advice, and, just as with adults,theydecide when you understand.The critical distinction Gottman realized is that its important toaccept all feelings - but not all behavior.If you skip imm ediately to problem-solving, the kid never learns the skill of how to deal with those uncomfortable emotions.You want to use empathetic listening. Get them to talk. Help them clarify. Validate their feelings (but, again, not necessarily their behavior). They need to feel you really understand and are on their side.Take a deep breath, relax and focus on them. Theyll notice if youre impatient or frustrated and just going through the motions.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildIn this context, listening means far more than collecting data with your ears. Empathetic listeners use their eyes to watch for physical evidence of their childrens emotions. They use their imaginations to see the situation from the childs perspective. They use their words to reflect back, in a soothing, noncritical way, what they are hearing and to help their children label their emotions.Relate their child problems to adult problems in your head to help you empathize.But why is she freaking out about he r new baby brother? It makes no senseReally? How would you like it if your spouse brought home a new lover and expected you to welcome them into the home? Get out of your head and into theirs. Relate. Empathize.Probing questions may be too much for a little kid. It can feel like interrogation. They may not even know why theyre sad. Try sharing simple observations. Say, I noticed that you frowned when I mentioned going to the party and then wait for a response.(To learn the 4 rituals neuroscience says will make you an awesome parent, clickhere.)Alright, theyre opening up. How do you calm them down and teach them how to cope?4) Help them label their emotionsA young child is not going to be able to say, Dearest mother, I apologize for my unnecessary irritability. My transition to the new kindergarten class has caused me an unexpected amount of stress. My future academic adjustments will be conducted with a level of grace heretofore unseen in our lovely household.Youve got the words the y dont.Help them get a handle on whats going on by labeling what they feel.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildProviding words in this way can help children transform an amorphous, scary, uncomfortable feeling into something definable, something that has boundaries and is a normal part of everyday life. Anger, sadness, and fear become experiences everybody has and everybody can handle. Labeling emotions goes hand in hand with empathy. A parent sees his child in tears and says, You feel very sad, dont you? Now, not only is the child understood, he has a word to describe this intense feeling. Studies indicate that the act of labeling emotions can have a soothing effect on the nervous system, helping children to recover more quickly from upsetting incidents.Dont gloss over this. Labeling is absurdly powerful.Neurosciencehas repeatedly demonstrated its ability to soothe emotions. Its one of the main techniqueshostage negotiatorsuse to keep the most dangerous situations calm.So w hen a child is crying because their sister got a better gift than they did, you dont want to be dismissive and say, Im sure youll get a better present next time. You want to validate and label the feeling with something like, You wish youd gotten something more fun. I bet that makes you feel kind of jealous.Now the kid is thinking, They understand me. And theyve learned something about how to cope by talking it out and labeling the emotions to get a handle on them. And Gottman found this leads to really good things.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildAs we have discussed earlier, the implications of teaching a child to self-soothe are enormous. Kids who can calm themselves from an early age show several signs of emotional intelligence They are more likely to concentrate better, have better peer relationships, higher academic achievement, and good health. My advice to parents, then, is to help your kids find words to describe what they are feeling. This doesnt mean telling ki ds how they ought to feel. It simply means helping them develop a vocabulary with which to express their emotions.(To learn how to make sure your kids are resilient, clickhere.)Theyre more calm. The storm has passed. Theyre learning about emotions. But how do you teach them better behavior and how to fix the actual problem?5) Set limits and help them problem-solveAgain, all feelings are acceptable - but all behavior isnt. You need to set limits.The parent-child relationship is not a democracy. Once the emotions are dealt with, you can be firm.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildAfter the parent acknowledges the emotion behind the misbehavior and helps him to label it, the parent can make sure the child understands that certain behaviors are inappropriate and cant be tolerated. Then the parent can guide the child into thinking of more appropriate ways to handle negative feelings. Youre mad that Danny took that game away from you, the parent might say. I would be, too. But it s not okay for you to hit him. What can you do instead?After youve listened empathetically, labeled feelings, and set limits on any bad behavior, its time to fix things. Someone needs to lead the problem solving. And that person isnotyou.This is another skill you want to help them develop. You wont always be there to tell them what to do. So encourage them to come up with ideas, guide them to a solution in line with your values that is effective and takes other peoples feelings into consideration. This is how emotionally intelligent kids become resourceful, responsible children.(To learn how to be a better parent, from Wharton professor Adam Grant, clickhere.)Okay, weve learned a lot. Lets round it up and address the question every realistic parent has been thinking from the startHow the heck am I supposed to do all of this stuff when Im stressed to the gills, were in the middle of the mall, and already 15 minutes late for a doctors appointment?Yes, there is an answer Sum upThis is how to raise emotionally intelligent kidsBe aware of emotions Canaries. Coal mines. Sometimes you can ignore the words but if you ignore the underlying feelings youre going to be cleaning spaghetti off the walls.Emotion is an opportunity for intimacy and teaching The best lessons about dealing with emotions are learned when things get emotional. Yes, this is inconvenient.Listen empathetically and validate feelings Accept all feelings but not all behavior. Dont interrogate, validate.Help them label their emotions Youve got the words they dont. It works for hostage negotiators so use it to make sure your kids dont end up talking to hostage negotiators.Set limits and help them problem-solveWe dont stab Timmy. Now how might we be able to exact revenge in a way that doesnt leave evidence?You dont always have time to do all of the above when a meltdown happens Or, more accurately, its extraordinarily rare when youeverhave time to. Understood.Dont worry. Gottman says you donthaveto do it when the problem occurs. That would be preferable, but as long as you set aside time to sit down and have the conversation, you can help your kid become more emotionally intelligent.FromRaising An Emotionally Intelligent ChildIn an ideal world, wed always have time to sit and talk with our kids as feelings come up. But for most parents, thats not always an option. Its important, therefore, to designate a time- preferably at the same period each day- when you can talk to your child without time pressures or interruptions.Emotion-coaching is not a panacea. It doesnt have Harry Potter magic powers to turn your little devil into a little angel. There will still be outbursts. Youll still need discipline and limits. But with time itll build a tighter bond with your child and help them develop a skill that will benefit them the rest of their life.What most parents want more than anything is for their kids to be happy. Whats happiness? An emotion.So youll teach them to go potty. And school will teach them how to think.But more than anything, dont forget to teach them how to feel.Join over 320,000 readers.Get a free weekly update via schmelzglashere.Thisarticleoriginally appeared atBarking Up the Wrong Tree.You might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people